26 September 2004

Conspiracy Theory

Geez, if the post title alone doesn't generate some traffic, I don't know what will.

Anyway, I got to thinking earlier today about a conspiracy theory that us card-carrying members of the VRWC can call our own. I mean, the other side has such a wealth of Art Bell calibre theories to toss about and, well, theorize on; why shouldn't we have a few theories to prove that we are not being fooled by (insert your own organization here)? Here's one for you:

Have you noticed that some of the prolific VRWC blogging voices have been silenced lately? Think about it, think about the conservative bloggers who have either gone missing or are "mailing it in" from points unknown.

Hmmmm. Curious, no?

den Beste has "retired"; Whittle surfaces every three weeks to say he's working on it; Jim at Smoke on the Water puts up a cryptic post about life kicking you in the nuts then goes deep; Rachel Lucas comes back with much fanfare, but then posts dog-blogging at an alarming rate; Frank J. suddenly has "other demands" on his time and the free ice cream has slowed to a trickle; and Misha suddenly has some idiot threatening his family and has to go into RealLife mode to take care of things.
Hmmmm. You know who's behind all this, don't you? Really? No clue? Well let me tell you what's what:

It's the Democratic Underground, that's who. That's right, the DU is behind all this. Don't you see? They can't let the conservative point of view get out there with it's laser-like, precision guided, truth-seeking-missle (thank you for the phrase Mr.Whittle, where ever you are) ability to skewer the liberal memes and they must be silenced. It's all so easily clear why and how this all happened. The strident voices of conservatism had to be stopped.

Bill Whittle and Frank J. both have new "friends" in their life and neither has had much to say lately. Sure, Whittle has always had a habit of going weeks and weeks without posting, but there's always been a pay off after the wait. Curious, Bill was close to releasing the "Tribes" essay, but now is re-examining his world-view. Frank has taken up hiking the Grand Canyon and installing / removing hurricane shutters (like that's a plausible excuse) instead of blogging. You see, the DU has placed female operatives into the mix to disrupt their blogging.

The DU (with help from MoveOn.org) is behind all these hurricanes, BTW. With so many conservative bloggers in Florida and Texas, and both Texas and Florida conveniently near water, the DU spewed forth extra quantities of hot air to affect the climate and cause all these hurricanes to interfere with VRWC bloggers. And Jim at Smoke on the Water lives on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico, aka The Hurricane Mosh Pit. You do the math.

Rachel Lucas and Steven den Beste both claim to suffer from "blogging burn out", you know like the kind of burn out you get when you wake up with the severed head of a horse in the bed next to you and a note that says "Stop your right wing blogging or else"

So it's easy to see that the DU has taken out these bloggers so that the liberal agenda can be advanced without impediment.
< / delusion >
OK, so it's all crap. But can you just imaging the howling from the left if half a dozen of their premier voices "mysteriously" went silent? I mean, the six bloggers I mentioned have like eleventy-seven gazillion hits between them and are on everyone's blogroll. Can you imagine the theories that would be put forth if some left wing blogger like, for instance Kos, suddenly posts that he has taken up organic celery gardening and that he may post again in a couple of months. Jebeezus, the DU would positively go nukular with theories that Karl Rove and the Digital BrownShirts had taken Kos out to silence him.
Or is it all true? Tonight, I keep getting "cannot find server" or DNS errors when I call up the aforementioned bloggers, but the DemocraticUnderground loaded just fine. Curious.....


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